


Instagram

by grossnoona



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Delusions, Drabble, M/M, Pining, This is REALLY pathetic ok
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-17 23:02:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21534514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grossnoona/pseuds/grossnoona
Summary: Haruto didn’t realise what he was doing until his eyes moved out of the white background of Instagram and into the tiny corner where the clock was placed on his phone.It was evident he had wasted his sleepless night staring into Instagram.Specifically,Tasuku’s Instagram account.Why isn’t that just sad? Haruto wants to bitterly laugh at himself.
Relationships: Takatoo Tasuku/Asuka Haruto, Takatoo Tasuku/Tsukioka Tsumugi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 52





	Instagram

**Author's Note:**

> Grossnoona here  
> I've been in bed all day bc I didn't want to move at all  
> Anyway, I wrote tasuharu angst with a good dab of tasutsumu bc _I love pain_  
>  I've been on a run of kpop-inspo songs so today's inspo is [Dean's Instagram](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihnzsr9yUEI)!  
> Do give this really sad, pining song a listen bc I honestly suddenly felt pathetic even though the only instagram acc I was scrolling through before this was a korean designer that I want to buy clothes from sdnkjd  
> anyway, I hope you enjoy!!

_ 2:00 am _

The white text indicates that number so clearly in the corner of Haruto’s phone. Just how long has he been awake? Haruto can’t tell.

Does he have work later? No, he doesn’t think so. It’s an off-day so he won’t have to drag himself out of bed for anything important, right? Haruto hopes not. He isn’t exactly interested in doing anything today.

Today? Well, yeah,  _ technically _ today is today. Not yesterday.

Haruto’s thoughts. They are a little in disarray, to be honest. Why is that? Haruto says he can’t figure out why but truth be told, he knows exactly why. It’s evident in the way he quietly and endlessly scrolls through his phone. It’s evident in the way his eyes lingers over the photos he sees. It’s evident in the way his room feels so much colder and emptier when he even thinks about the man in those photos he’s staring at.

How pathetic, Haruto wants to mock himself.

Stop staring, Haruto wants to tell himself.

“ _ It’s obvious that  _ **_he_ ** _ doesn’t love you anymore _ ,” Haruto says aloud to break the heavy dead silence. Even with that harsh comment said, it doesn’t change the heavy weight in the room. It’s still heavy as ever. Haruto hates it.

Why won’t it go away?

Why won’t that undeniable jealousy go away whenever he sees Tasuku with  _ that stupid childhood friend of his _ . Are they dating? Maybe they are now that Haruto thinks about it. That rather new post of Tasuku’s childhood friend smiling so cheekingly at the camera―it’s obvious that Tasuku is whipped for this blue-haired boy. You don’t have to know a single thing about either of them to know that they’re happily in love.

‘ _ For the record, Tsumugi told me a bad joke before this was taken #stophim _ ’

What a god awful caption for a picture of an annoying person, Haruto bitterly thought. It’s 2:30 am, he doesn’t have to deny how fucking jealous he is of Tsumugi. It’s not like anyone will listen, anyway. Who else is awake at this godly hour? Maybe some goddamn NEET but Haruto doesn’t live near anyone as pathetic as that so he can safely assume that _ it’s just him _ .

It’s disgusting to feel this way, honestly. It’s gross. It’s pathetic. Yet Haruto can’t stop this bitter-tasting feeling from forming whenever he looks at Tasuku’s instagram account. He’s also trying his  _ goddamn _ hardest to not want to throw a big fit every time he sees Tsumugi in Tasuku’s account. It’s so fucking stupid that he’s even  _ this bitter _ over someone like Tsumugi.

It feels like a morbid joke.

Haruto can’t help it. Haruto seriously can’t help it.

Maybe he’s jealous over the fact that he couldn’t express his feelings well enough. Maybe he’s jealous over the fact that he couldn’t form  _ that _ kind of relationship with Tasuku. Maybe he’s jealous that he couldn’t win Tasuku over the same way Tsumugi could. Maybe he’s jealous that even with the close relationship he made with the other―Tasuku would drop  _ literally anything _ for Tsumugi. Haruto can’t match up to someone like Tsumugi.

Tasuku probably wouldn’t do the same for Haruto, he can vouch that.

Just what on earth is so great about Tsumugi? Nothing. There’s nothing  _ that  _ great about Tsumugi as far as Haruto’s concerned. His performance in Winter Troupe’s debut was sweet but it wasn’t exactly anything to be in awe of, honestly. Personality-wise, Haruto thinks Tsumugi is pretty boring. Then again, Tasuku is  _ a pretty boring  _ person too.

“They suit each other then,” Haruto bitterly spits as he stares at a post of a photo of two kids holding hands, captioned; ‘ _ Tsumugi only became short because he used to lie to me alot #dontliekids _ ’. Well, that’s sweet to know, Tasuku.

Haruto doesn’t want to admit it. He really doesn’t but there’s no use in hiding, right? Haruto quietly and angrily cries as he curled into a ball. Just why isn’t it Haruto that Tasuku is sweetly posting about? Why isn’t it Haruto that Tasuku is probably hugging tightly in bed tonight? Why isn’t it Haruto being comforted by Tasuku who will whispers  _ I love yous _ into his forehead?

Just where? Where did Haruto go wrong in loving Tasuku?

Why did Tasuku have to leave and love someone else?

_ 3:00 am _

Haruto blinks wearily as he stares at his phone. That number stares at him, probably pitifully if it could. Haruto spent probably half an hour, just crying helplessly over someone who won’t even look at him that sweetly anymore. Honestly, Haruto is so pathetic.

Haruto can’t tell if what he’s seeing is real or not. Haruto thinks fatigue has started making him delusional because Tasuku can’t be lying down next to him, wiping his tears and whispering  _ I’m sorry _ .

Even if it’s pathetic, Haruto wants to keep this fake Tasuku close to him. Just for tonight―he wants some form of comfort. Though, it’s not exactly closure. Not like that kind of thing matters to Haruto.

“Yeah, so how are you these days?” Haruto asks to the wall that he’s staring at.

( _ Tasuku laughs and says “same old. What about you? _ ”)

“I’m still the same too―can’t sleep” Haruto continues.

( _ Tasuku shakes his head in disappointment. Don’t get yourself sick, his frown says. _ )

“I saw you got a new haircut,” Haruto says as he turns away from Tasuku.

Though, Haruto isn’t facing this fake delusion of Tasuku. He knows Tasuku isn’t next to him anymore. He got up and left, already. Haruto is aware of that.

“But I didn’t press like―it just seems a bit funny to do,” Haruto says before laughing dryly.

Haruto turns his head to the direction to where the fake Tasuku was resting next to him. He had left long ago.

  
_ Just like the real one _ .

**Author's Note:**

> (wild gestures) Haruto pls find a boyfriend or soemthing  
> I'm going to be honest, unlike my enst drabbles, this won't have a companion piece bc that would be so _fucking sad_ bc haruto is sadly right!! tasuku won't be thinking abt him!! he's too busy being in love w tsumugi!! which sucks!!  
> anyway, I hope you had fun!!  
> Thank you for reading!!  
> (If you want, you can follow me on twt [@drunkossan](https://twitter.com/drunkossan)


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